When Joann Gardner was diagnosed with stage 3 lung cancer in October 2024, the news landed like a shockwave through the home she shares with daughter, Kim. At 81, active and fiercely independent, Joann had never smoked. Cancer simply wasn’t something she saw coming.
“I immediately started to pray and put it in God’s hands,” Joann says. “That’s how I deal with things I can’t control.”
Kim suddenly found herself navigating unfamiliar territory – medical appointments, insurance paperwork, treatment decisions, and the emotional weight of watching her mother endure cancer treatment. While Joann bristles at the idea of being “taken care of,” Kim quietly stepped into a partial caregiver role.
“I’m going through this cancer journey with her,” says Kim. “And it’s painful to watch her go through it.”
Joann opted out of surgery that would have removed part of her lungs, choosing instead radiation and chemotherapy. Since then, she has continued treatment, including HER2-targeted therapy. But it’s not been easy for the retired teacher’s assistant; she’s experienced side effects like leg swelling, jitteriness, and an unsettling “out of body” feeling.
For Kim, the emotional toll was heavier than she expected. “Trying to make sure she’s getting the best care, filling out paperwork, and dealing with financial questions brought on a lot of anxiety,” she shares. “There are so many things you’re juggling at once.”
Their collective turning point came thanks to a neighbor who mentioned Cancer Support Community North Texas (CSCNT). Kim knew she needed support and resources – not just for her mom, but for herself. Joann joined first, attending online support group meetings, cooking and educational workshops.
“The support groups are really informative when you can talk to other people with cancer and their different experiences with it,” says Joann. “CSCNT has a lot of different activities and it’s a wonderful program for anyone to participate in. It makes you feel better about yourself – takes your mind off all you’re going through.”
Kim soon realized CSCNT was just as much for caregivers as it was for patients. “They made me feel very welcome from the start,” she says. “I remember hearing a woman talk about going through cancer all by herself because she didn’t know these services existed. I can’t imagine doing this alone.”
The support helped Kim put words to feelings she’d been carrying quietly. “As a daughter and caregiver, I feel like I’m never doing enough,” she admits. “There are things I can’t say around the doctors or even my mom. CSCNT reminded me that you’re not alone, and that it’s okay to ask for help.”
Now, Kim plans to explore individual counseling through CSCNT, while encouraging her mom to try more in-person activities like Tai Chi. “We’re still pretty new to this,” she says. “I want us to use even more of what’s available.”
For Joann, the biggest gift CSCNT offers is connection. “It’s good to be around people and have fun – not just sitting in the house,” she says. “When you talk to others with cancer and hear their different experiences, it really helps.”
Together, Joann and Kim are learning how to balance independence and support, fear and faith, caregiving and self-care. And through CSCNT, they’ve found something essential: A community that sees both of them, exactly where they are, and reminds them they don’t have to walk this road alone.